Last month I had dinner with my six youngest children at a restaurant (ages 6 to 22). It had been a long time since we were all at one table. I loved every minute of reminiscing and laughter. Midway though the meal I realized and announced, “If I practiced birth control, I would be the only one at this table right now!” Everyone was quiet for two seconds then they all busted out laughing. What a blessing!

Full quivers are blessings, but they also produce many challenges. Families of all sizes will experience joy as well as heartache. When children are small they step on your toes; as adults they step on your hearts. When you love deeply you can be hurt deeply.

I have experienced the deepest hurt when our adult children have not understood my spiritual beliefs or convictions. I have also experienced a flood of grace, forgiveness, joy, and overwhelming deeper love when misunderstandings are resolved.

Dealing with hurt or difficult family situations can exhaust our strength and understanding. The temptation is to get angry, complain, or put up a giant wall. But the mature and godly answer is to love as God loves us. I’m still working on it. Dying to self is the solution and allowing the Holy Spirit to live through us is the answer (Gal. 2:20, Luke 9:23). When we work for God we are working a spiritual purpose, an eternal purpose, a godly purpose.

Therefore, my beloved brethren, be ye stedfast, unmoveable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, forasmuch as ye know that your labour is not in vain in the Lord. (1 Cor. 15:58).

During family trials our motives and understandings can be transformed into strength:

And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. (1 Pet. 5:10).

God comforts us when we’re afflicted, and from His consolation we learn to comfort others. I received an encouraging email this morning on this issue:

…A seed appears dead when some of the most vital stages of life force are developing under that dry surface; and some of the most abundant-looking trees have to be pruned or else those same leafy branches will bear no fruit at all next season. Only the Gardener understands this fully. We seem to forget, year after year, as we lament over the dead plants of autumn and the pile of leafy pruned branches on the brush pile! He is at work, and next spring’s growth will be glorious as we allow Him His will in our “garden.” Hallelujah!…

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